The "e" words

Now that I'm in the third trimester, a change has come over me. I am getting this false sense of courage and flipping ahead to the later chapters of the pregnancy books where the "e" words like "episiotomy" and "epidural" are making an appearance on a regular basis. These chapters also contain the more graphic pictures and the play by play about the "journey" the baby will take through a series of tunnels in my body.

Perhaps false sense of courage is a little negative. I guess it's more like an acceptance that the growing baby inside me really has no way out except through my body cavities, whether natural or artificial (as in a c-section, I mean). Besides, I guess I have come to accept that so many other women before me have endured this before so it can't be that scary.

I do notice that there is silence among the sisterhood about exactly what happens during the birth. The pain thing is glossed over and the focus is more on the reward, i.e. a shiny new baby. Are they waiting for me to ask them how it really went? If I did, will they give me an honest answer or is there a sisterhood pact regarding the limits of the details that one can reveal?

I'm getting braver, but apparently not brave enough to ask the right questions yet.